Date My Brand: Google
Twenty years with Google. That’s longer than most of my actual relationships. But now we’re at that moment every long-term couple dreads: a younger, more exciting rival has caught my eye.
ChatGPT hit 100 million daily users in just two months. It's now averaging 800 million, according to CEO Sam Altman’s April TED Talk. Google Search—the product that built a $1.7 trillion empire (per Google Search)—took years to reach those numbers. We’re turning to AI chatbots for the kind of straight answers Google once delivered, but now buries under sponsored links and SEO fluff. The honeymoon is officially over.
It Was Love at First Search
I met Google in early 2000s San Francisco. The city buzzed with tech-bro energy and founder hype. I was designing print brochures in the digital Wild West when a friend basically staged an intervention: “You’re still using AltaVista? Oh guuurl, let me introduce you to Google.”
First impression? Clean. Playful. Refreshingly simple. Just a colourful logo and a search bar—no pop-ups, no chaos. Their “Don’t Be Evil” motto actually felt sincere. Google seemed like the rare tech company with both success and soul.
Then came Gmail. I was still clinging to an embarrassing Hotmail address (don’t judge—we all have relationship baggage) when those elusive invites became digital currency. Getting one felt like joining a secret club. Soon I was fully committed: Chrome as my default browser, Google slides for work presos. Google Drive holding everything from holiday pics to tax files. The relationship was so seamless, leaving would feel like digital homelessness.
The Quarter-Life Crisis Hits Hard
But twenty years changes people. And brands.
Now Google’s in the thick of a quarter-life crisis. Search, its core product, is facing real competition for the first time. Tools like Perplexity, Claude, and of course, ChatGPT are offering a different kind of experience: conversational, direct, and refreshingly free of ad clutter.
I decided we needed to talk. So I asked Gemini (Google’s rebrand of the disastrous Bard), “Why do I prefer ChatGPT over Google?” To my surprise, it got real:
“One of the biggest advantages of ChatGPT is that it provides concise, human-like responses. Instead of clicking through multiple links, users get a well-structured answer in one place.” A rare moment of algorithmic self-awareness.
We’re Not Breaking Up—But I’m Seeing Other Platforms
So where do we stand, Google and I?
I’m not ready for a clean break. The switching costs are high—they’ve got my photos, my emails, my documents. But I’m definitely seeing other platforms. I ask ChatGPT questions I once would’ve Googled. I’m setting boundaries. Managing expectations.
It’s that inevitable point in any long-term commitment: Can they get back to what made them special? Or is convenience the only thing keeping us together?
For now, we continue our daily rituals. I search, they respond. But that early spark—the one that made me evangelise Google to friends in the early 2000s—has dimmed. Occasionally, I glimpse the old magic in a particularly helpful result or a clever new feature. But those moments are fewer and further between.
Twenty years in, we’re still together. But when I want a straight answer without the games, I’m swiping right on someone new.